So, in a bout of frustration you have stumbled across this article, questing for something to put an end to your boredom. And fortunately for you, you have come to the right place. Peruse this treasure-trove of ideas, and pick an activity that sounds appealing. You’ll be having fun in no time!
Disclaimer: I, in no way, accept any responsibility for any arrests, injuries, or deaths resulting from the following suggestions. But on the bright side, going to jail/the hospital/the afterlife will at least get you out of the house!
1. Watch the Jerry Springer show, screaming obscenities at the tv like the redneck you are.
2. Give your guinea pig a haircut. If you don’t have a guinea pig, sit down, cry out of loneliness, then get your ass up and find yourself a guinea pig. Proceed to cut the hair of said guinea pig.
3. Teach yourself the Cyrillic alphabet, and then write a poem expressing your love of language in perfect Ukrainian.
4. Listen to every One Direction song ever made - without contemplating killing yourself. If a suicidal thought enters your mind, start over.
5. Become a hard-core Canucks fan. Make posters and dye your hair blue and green. Follow every tweet, interview, and article. And watch every single game until they win the Stanley Cup Playoffs. *Life-time commitment required.
6. Go to the best ice-cream place in town, and try every single flavour.
7. Develop an extensive workout routine to drop the pounds you gained while stuffing your face with ice-cream.
8. Go to Wal-Mart, and ask an employee if their walls are for sale. If they say no, accuse them of false advertising, question their integrity, and storm out in a huff.
9. Skydive – make a search on Google Earth, and zoom in really fast. Eh, that’s close enough.
10. Master the art of sword-swallowing.
11. Acquire a sheep. Shave that sheep. Spin that sheep’s wool into yarn. Knit a kickass afghan, then feel bad and give it to your naked, shivering sheep. You jerk.
12. Set a timer, and don’t think about turtles for 5 minutes. If you think about them, start over. (This one is probably impossible).
13. Use peanuts and birdseed to lure all the squirrels in the neighbourhood into your backyard. Become the Squirrel Master, leading your new followers to world domination.
14. Narrate everything going on around you - in a Scottish accent.
15. Go through the McDonalds drive thru. Order 8 Big Macs, 10 large fries, 60 chicken nuggets, a few milkshakes, and a Diet Coke (because you still haven’t lost all your ice-cream weight). “Forget” your wallet.
16. Have a conversation without using the letter ‘S’. Time how long you can go.
17. Move everything in your house 2 inches to the left, just for shits and giggles. Realize you have a crippling fear of change, and proceed to burn the house down.
18. Turn everything you say into a hypothetical question. “What if I could turn everything I say into a hypothetical question?” “What if this becomes incredibly annoying?”
19. Create clothing from your curtains, Cinderella-style. What, you don’t have little bird and mice friends who can sing and sew? Better get training.
20. Watch a 6 hour marathon of Here Comes Honey Boo Boo. Question what you’re doing with your life.
21. Examine your belly button for lint, and find something that looks like it could be food. Make a decision.
22. Disprove the theory of gravity by jumping off the roof (of your neighbour’s house, because you burned yours down). Physics is for suckers.
23. Watch an animals' rights video on YouTube. Never eat meat again.
24. Think of every poor decision you have ever made - every stupid thing you have ever done – all at once. Cry.
25. Drink an entire pot of coffee, with half a cup of sugar. While bouncing off the walls (that disappointingly, Wal-Mart didn't sell you), see what ideas you can come up with on your own.
So there you have it – 25 things to do when you’re bored. If you liked this article, please share it on Twitter, Facebook, etc. Heck, you obviously have nothing better to do, and think of all the other bored people who will benefit!